A husband’s greatest need from his wife is her love and respect. God’s Word states clearly the importance of this need in Ephesians 5:33 as wives are commanded to respect their husbands. But what does that look like? And what practical ways can a wife express respect to her husband? Last week, we looked at one such expression–encouraging her husband. And we continue this week with another way wives can daily show love and respect to their husbands–from a husband’s point of view.
“The LORD God said ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'” – Genesis 2:18
This next expression of love and respect a wife can give to her husband may not be seen as a big deal. But believe me…it is. That “big deal” is companionship.
Have you seen the Geico commercial with the cowboy and his “girl”? He is riding off on his horse, and she is yelling, “Jesse, don’t go!” He calls back to her, “I’m sorry, Daisy, but I’m a loner. And a loner’s got to be alone.” It’s a funny commercial and a comical picture picture of what we men want others to think about us.
Of course, being a loner is not how God made us. He did not create us to be alone. Do you recall the one thing God added to His creation on the sixth day? He called His creation “good,” except for one thing. We are told in Genesis 2:18: “The LORD God said ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'” So God created Eve to be Adam’s helper, partner, closest companion–for them to be “united to“ each other and to be “one flesh“ (Genesis 2:24).
Friends, brothers at church, co-workers, and others are important to us men. But there is only one person with whom a husband is “one,” as God says (Ephesians 5:31). Only one person with whom we can share anything. Only one person to whom we can tell our deepest thoughts, hopes, dreams, pains, disappointments and failures and be assured we will be heard and responded to with love and respect. That person is our wife. Or, at least that should be the case.
We husbands may not need the companionship of others in the same way–or with as many people–as our wives do, but we do desire it. Especially with the person we care the most about–our wife. I have read, as part of my education and preparation for teaching, study after study about the importance of close companionship to happiness, good health, a long life, and emotional and spiritual well-being.
No relationship is more important than our relationship with God, and no human relationship is more important than that with our spouse. God, of course, knew this without the need for research. After all, He created us.
This is why God led Solomon–the man to whom He gave the gift of great wisdom–to write Ecclesiastes 4:7-12: “Again I saw something meaningless under the sun: There was a man all alone; he had neither son nor brother. There was no end to his toil, yet his eyes were not content with his wealth. ‘For whom am I toiling,’ he asked, ‘and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?’ This too is meaningless-a miserable business! Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
What a beautiful picture of marriage! A husband and wife working together to build something beautiful…something strong. They help each other, pick the other up when they stumble and fall, keep each other warm and secure, and defend each other. And the third strand making it all complete and strong enough to stand firm, whatever may come? That is the Lord. A husband and wife committed to Him will not be broken apart.
So, men, there is no shame that we need the companionship of our wives. We need their love, encouragement, assurance, strength, and assistance. They need ours, too, and we need to provide it with both our words and actions. God created us that way. He created marriage to be that bond for both husband and wife.
Wives, make time for your husbands. Be on their side and by their side. Enjoy life together.
And husbands, let’s do the same for our wives. After all, isn’t that why we got married in the first place? To walk through this life together?
Questions for Discussion
- Read again Ecclesiastes 4:7-12. What is God saying here about the importance of companionship? How could these truths be specifically applied to your marriage?
- Express to your husband or wife some specific ways you appreciate and are blessed by the companionship you share.
- No matter how strong your relationship with God and with your spouse, it can always be stronger. What are some specific ways you and your spouse can grow still stronger in your relationship with each other and with the Lord?
- What is one way you can spend more time together as a couple that you have been neglecting or maybe never done before?
Next week, we’ll discuss one more way a husband needs his wife to show him love and respect–from a husband’s point of view (and from God’s Word).
May God bless you in all His wonderful ways,
Other posts from A WIFE’S LOVE AND RESPECT FROM A HUSBAND’S VIEW series:
Part 3–Praying for Him
Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture taken from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.